NEW HR POLICY

Dress Code:

1) You could dress as you like and it always shows your taste

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2) If  you don any branded item, it indicates that you are well off and do not need a raise.

3) Your taste is not as per the trend shows you are thrifty in your spending and definitely need no hike as you are in command of money spent. Therefore,  you do not need a raise.

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4) In case you dress rightly, you are doing great and therefore need to wait more for the salary hike.

Sick Days:
It is flat ‘NO’ off. If you could make it to the Doc  you could certainly make it to the office. No future sick certificates would earn you a day off.

Holidays / Vacations:
You should be well aware that 104 days a year are enough for holidays that is weekends.

Toilet Breaks:

If you were following good good habits taught during childhood, you certainly need no time to release yourself.  At the most just 4 minutes should be sufficient to be relieved peacefully. More than this will invite you for action through cctv scanning when the doors to toilet will swing open after 5 minutes of and on the third screening your pic will go on the notice board for the action. Maintain a smile during your confinement for calls of the nature. Your smile means a lot to the company. Person with no smile during this break is likely to be demoted.

Lunch Break:

* Healthy people will be given 30 minutes to maintain their status of good health.

* Happy people need only 20 minutes to lunch as they have good effect on others and remain an example to emulate.

* Stocky and Chubby get just 10 minutes so that they are within limits of their diet calories.

They Company will remain grateful to all those who remain loyal to the these new rules. We want you to set an example to the new joiners and juniors. Any question and  in case of doubts should come through the section heads or the Manager concerned.

The new  HR policy will be implemented by the coming monday.

The Management.

Harinder

Former Sailing Sea Captain at V.Ships, Miami, FL, USA (retired in 2009). Studied BA (Sophomore) at The Principia, now lives in Jaipur, India

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